Adarq.org

yo if you're interested in the growth delusion, check out doughnut economics, by kate raworth. goes way beyond the limitations of GDP to suggest an entirely new set of metaphors and basic measures for economic health.

- pull ups x 12
had 13 or maybe 14 if i pushed.

goofing off, amped because gf and i are heading out tonight! i'll work out while i'm in the states but not holding myself to any plan. i may post while i'm away but if not: merry christmas and happy new year, my adarq.org people. best wishes for the rest of 2018 and the beginning of 2019.

a true freak:

also: if I tried my absolute hardest, i might be able to hang with her for 1km, not even 3 laps.

this boggles me about cheserek, too, but in the other direction. he's doing km repeats at 2:50ish and making it look easy. 8 km plus the two reps at 2 km: 12 km total with rest in between each rep and set. that's a gnarly workout that is beyond the ability of roughly 99.9999999% of the world's population. kipchoge did 42km, straight, at ~2:54; his final two splits were 2:48 and 2:44.

i mean come on.

- run 6.02 km in 30:26

- push up x 12,17,13

- stretch

keeping the embers lit.

- run 8.01 km in 41:24
didn't feel great, although calves were fine so that's good. died a little in last km (5:23), bringing average to 5:10, which is a touch slow but nbd. i've definitely lost a bit of fitness but that's no surprise.

- stretch

if you have a fever, rest! your body is telling you to rest! it's okay to miss training! recovery>*

back on that unintentional poetry kick:

It was cold and windy
with a spray like rain but with a little
bigger rain drops.

As I entered I felt a little
sore in the chest, which
turned out to be a cold,
when I came back home.

i understand the embarrassment but you shouldn't be. drug addiction -- and alcohol is a drug -- is a nasty disease. our bodies compel us to do things like drink water and eat sugar and fat and breathe in and out by rewarding us chemically. when we find something that goes straight to the reward system, and takes us out of ourselves by altering our consciousness, it can be extremely difficult to give it up. and some people are more susceptible to impulsive, compulsive use than others. seems like you're in the former category, it's been clear on here for years that you have an issue with alcohol abuse.

so no, it's not as simple as "just stop drinking." but you do have agency. get yourself to an AA meeting. AA doesn't work for everyone, or maybe even most people, but it's saved some people i know. my dad's best friend is 35 years sober and still goes to AA every week, even on vacation. it completely failed for my brother. ymmv. but try it. see if you can find a therapist in your town who does dialectical behavioral therapy, one on one or in groups. try that. just keep trying to stop. do not quit on yourself.